A few years back, I wrote a full screenplay titled “Stallion Cornell.” It will never be produced, largely due to the offensive nature of this first scene. But if you’ve seen the opening to Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life, this won’t be too startling.
EXT. MOUNTAINSIDE – DAY
Wide shot of a WOMAN climbing up the side of a steep mountain in a burqa. The wind is howling around her as she struggles up the peak. Her back is to the camera.
CLOSE-UP of the WOMAN’s hands. She grunts and strains as she makes her ascent. Her face remains concealed.
EXT. MOUNTAINTOP PLATEAU – DAY
The WOMAN arrives on top of the mountain, which is an impossibly tiny plateau with a steep drop-off – a few steps and the woman would fall off the other side. She is only visible in wide shot. For the first time, we see that she is pregnant – very pregnant, indeed.
The WOMAN, back to the camera, squats and grunts, as if taking a dump.
A gush of blood falls from between the folds of the burqa. It is followed by a newborn baby. The WOMAN picks up the baby and yanks off the umbilical cord.
The baby cries.
The woman lays the baby on the plateau. She pauses. The baby continues to cry. The woman then takes a step backward and leaps off the other side of the plateau, screaming as she falls.
MAIN TITLES: STALLION CORNELL
TITLE: FORTY YEARS LATER…
That’s all you get… for now.