Stallion Cornell

Mytwo-year-old son and I have the same first name – James – and before too long, he’ll be too old to be rocked to sleep by a lullaby. That’s too bad, because he loves “Sweet Baby James” by James Taylor. He always nods off during the chorus:

Goodnight, you moonlight ladiesRockabye, Sweet Baby JamesDeep greens

... Read more

Unionssuck.That is all. ... Read more

Onceupon a time - about a hundred and fifty years ago, to be precise - in a faraway land called Birmingham, England, there lived a humble bricklayer named Richard.Yes, Richard laid bricks. It was a good and useful skill to have, since Birmingham was a big ol' city that needed a bunch of bricks for ... Read more

Thinkingabout my previous hatred essay, I came to realize that I’m usually on the receiving end of the whole hate thing. I’m somewhat impressive in the sense that over the course of my life, more than a few folks have hated me with a burning passion. Something about me inspires pure loathing that can ... Read more

Ifeel very sorry for Senator Craig. His career is over and his reputation is shot, not necessarily because of what he did but, rather, what he’s doing now. His revisionist explanations of the events in question are more than pathetic. He attributes his footsie with the guy in the stall next to him to his ... Read more

Mysix-year-old son hates school. At least, that’s what he screams on a regular basis. “I hate school! I HATE IT! I HATE IT!” He repeats this mantra every night before going to sleep. There’s usually some flailing involved, too. You get the idea.Now I don’t think he really hates school. He’s all smiles when he ... Read more

Itlooks like I’m taking requests now.I received the following message at one of the various goofy billboards I frequent.Do you take requests for your blog? If so, I'd like to read something by you on a particular aspect of Mormonism. The concept that we are in essence training to be gods of our own ... Read more

Inthese times of strife and tumult, I lament the fact that my own children are growing up in a world where caller ID has effectively destroyed the art of the prank phone call.We called them “crank calls,” although “prank” is a more accurate but less alliterative description. I began with the old standards: “Is your ... Read more

SoI’m watching the extras on the "Superman: The Movie" DVD, and up pops Andrew Fogelson, billed as head of marketing for Warner Brothers from 1978-1980. Suddenly, in my mind, I’m back at Calabasas High School; the year is 1985, and Andrew Fogelson is not happy with me.Calabasas High School is nestled in a corner of ... Read more

Inthe state of Missouri, up until 1976, it was legal to shoot a Mormon on sight.Actually, it probably wasn’t, because more recent murder statutes would have taken precedence over the so-called “Extermination Order” issued in 1838 by then-Governor Lilliburn Boggs. That order read, in part, as follows:

The Mormons must be treated as enemies, and

... Read more