Almost all Washingtonian stupidity can somehow be traced back to the presidential administration of one James Earl Carter.
By effectively abandoning the Shah of Iran in the name of human rights piety, Carter emboldened the radical Islamist movement and gave lunatics and thugs a permanent foothold in the Middle East. 9/11 happened because Clinton ignored Bin Laden, but Bin Laden happened because Carter created a world where such monsters had legitimacy on the world stage. He responded to the hostage crisis and Soviet aggression by wringing his hands, boycotting the Olympics, and begging tyrants to be nice to us. His only attempted military response was when he micromanaged a botched hostage rescue attempt that ended up with eight dead Marines dumped unceremoniously into the desert.
Domestically, Carter essentially destroyed the value of U.S. currency. Rampant inflation, crushing double-digit interest rates, and soaring oil prices decimated the economy, and Carter responded by going on television and blaming the American people in his famous “malaise” speech. Defenders point out that he never actually used the word “malaise,” but malaise by any other name is still malaisey.
Fade out, fade in. Barack Obama, the newly christened nominee for the Democrats, wants us to know that “We can’t drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times . . . and then just expect that other countries are going to say OK.” This is your hero, America! He’s here to tell you that the days of wine and roses are over. Morning in America was back in 1984. We’re heading into twilight now, so be sure to wear a sweater so you don’t have to turn up the thermostat.
Can we restore the era of malaise? Giddy Obama supporters scream in unison: yes, we can!
Obama is a younger, hipper Jimmy Carter, and too many Americans have forgotten just how terrifying that is. Cap and trade legislation, which gives the government the power to lift trillions of dollars out of the private sector to symbolically fight a problem that doesn’t exist, will likely double present fuel costs. Fireside chats with lunatic madmen will make Obama feel righteous and provide plenty of reassurance to the animals who welcome the emergence of a weaker America. They won’t be our friends, though. They’ll just be glad of the license to kill more Jews.
The only real difference between Carter and Obama is that Carter wasn’t the president of 57 states.
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The Carter comparisons have some in the conservative media salivating, because they think electing another Carter will mean that the GOP will have finally hit bottom and elect another Reagan to replace him.
Maybe so. Except I have no idea who that Reagan is. It certainly won’t be Mitt Romney if he saddles himself to John McCain as his veep. As the number 2 guy, Mitt would have to support McCain’s “Obama Lite” agenda, which includes the same cap and trade nonsense, a contempt for genuine conservative principles, and a willingness to throw Republicans under the bus if it gets him lauded in the editorial pages of the New York Times.
And in the meantime, think of the damage that another Carter will be able to inflict this time. The next conservative president will have to dismantle a brand new socialized health care system, the aforementioned cap and trade debacle, and will have to deal with at least two new wild-eyed liberals permanently ensconced on the Supreme Court.
I can’t see a silver lining in any of this. Somebody please talk me off of the ledge.
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