stallioncornell
My Brushes with Greatness
MiltonBerle flipped me off once.
I was singing with a children’s choir outside the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion, and our group was getting our picture taken. Milton Berle thought it would be funny to flip us off. Maybe it was to get us to smile. Maybe it was because he was a deeply disturbed, strange man. ... Read more
I was singing with a children’s choir outside the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion, and our group was getting our picture taken. Milton Berle thought it would be funny to flip us off. Maybe it was to get us to smile. Maybe it was because he was a deeply disturbed, strange man. ... Read more The Healing Field: Connecting the Dots
OnSeptember 11, 2002, I was the Communications Director for the city of Sandy, Utah. A few days earlier, I had gotten a phone call from a guy named Paul Swenson, who ran a business called Colonial Flag, which had its offices only a few blocks away from Sandy City Hall. He had, what seemed to ... Read more
Holiday Euphemisms
HappyHolidays!What? You think I’m jumping the gun by just a few months? Then, obviously, you’re not looking at a calendar. Rosh Hashanah begins on September 12th at sundown, and both Yom Kippur and Ramadan start on September 21st. And, apparently, Japan celebrates Respect for the Aged Day on September 17th.Yet “Happy Holidays” is an unnecessary ... Read more
Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity
So, according to Ain't It Cool News, the new G.I. Joe movie is going to feature an international fighting force rather than a “real American hero.” In addition, G.I. Joe will now be an acronym for "Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity" to make all the multilateralists giddy with excitement.Why?Well, according to a Fox News report, ... Read more Missing Langy
Afellow Languatron opponent reminded me of this video recently, and it made me laugh anew. I made this sometime last year, and it’s not nearly as a waste of time as it seems at first glance. That’s not to say it wasn’t a waste of time at all, but it was my first foray into ... Read more
Hooey
Ihate Cascading Style Sheets.Someone who wants to make a fortune will invent a reliable, easy-to-use CSS WYSIWIG editor. If you’ve got one, would you please get it to me by noon today?Thank you.I also hate doing dishes and/or laundry, especially at the same time. I’ve never done them at the same time, but I’m sure ... Read more
Fred, Rudy, and a Block of Cheese
MyEsteemed Crank-Calling Colleague once called Senator Barbara Boxer’s office and complained that she was denying his basic constitutional right to life, liberty, and a block of cheese. I thought about this while trying to decide whether or not Fred Thompson’s entry into the presidential race is a good thing.Right now, I’m leaning toward “not.”I watched ... Read more
The Mormon Dialogue Continues…
Withthe author’s permission, I quote from his recent response to my earlier blog entry.I hope I never offended or embarassed you.You did neither, but I appreciate your concern.It always seems like you're reluctant to talk about the coolest aspects of your faith like you're embarassed about them. Reluctant? Probably. I’m not sure ... Read more
Sweet Baby James
Mytwo-year-old son and I have the same first name – James – and before too long, he’ll be too old to be rocked to sleep by a lullaby. That’s too bad, because he loves “Sweet Baby James” by James Taylor. He always nods off during the chorus:
Goodnight, you moonlight ladiesRockabye, Sweet Baby JamesDeep greens... Read more