{"id":2387,"date":"2013-01-22T21:46:55","date_gmt":"2013-01-23T04:46:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/?p=2387"},"modified":"2013-01-22T21:46:55","modified_gmt":"2013-01-23T04:46:55","slug":"an-important-nick-smith-update","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/an-important-nick-smith-update\/","title":{"rendered":"An Important Nick Smith Update"},"content":{"rendered":"

You haven’t forgotten our pal Nick Smith, have you? He’s the hater who emailed me out of the blue to inform me how dippy Mormons are<\/a>, something he knows personally because Mormon women are dumb enough to have sex with him. I would think he’d recognize how badly that reflects on him<\/em>, not me, but what do I know? I’m<\/em> the stupid one, remember?<\/p>\n

Anyhoo, as I described in my last post on the subject<\/a>, I emailed him back and heard nothing. Nothing! Up late one night, I sent him one final message…<\/p>\n

\n
\n
\n
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From:<\/b> Stallion Cornell <stallion@stallioncornell.com>
\nTo:<\/b> Nick Smith <nicksmith382@yahoo.com>
\nSent:<\/b> Saturday, January 12, 2013 2:15 AM
\nSubject:<\/b> Re:<\/div>\n
So are we done, then? I found a very stupid Jehovah’s Witness you might be interested in.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/blockquote>\n

 <\/p>\n

And tonight, almost two weeks later, I got a response! Here it is…<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n
On Jan 22, 2013, at 8:53 PM, Nick Smith <nicksmith382@yahoo.com> wrote:<\/div>\n
\n
Why is this weirdo still talking to me? You’re a clown<\/div>\n<\/blockquote>\n

 <\/p>\n

Naturally, I decided to still talk to him.<\/p>\n

Nick! Buddy! I thought you were too busy diddling pious imbeciles to finish up our little chat! How’s tricks? (I mean that literally.)<\/p>\n

Hugs and kisses,<\/p>\n

Mormon Bozo (Mozo for short.)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

As soon as I hear word, I shall inflict it upon my loyal readership post haste.<\/p>\n

UPDATE:<\/strong> His latest missive arrived at 5:21 AM on the morning of January 23, 2013:<\/p>\n

I think you’ve just confirmed how ridiculous you people truly are. Good grief <\/em><\/p>\n

A Charlie Brown fan! Naturally, I fired off another round…<\/p>\n

You and I have very different ideas about what constitutes the ridiculous. In my mind, “ridiculous” usually involves a public lack of pants. “Ridiculous” is Bob Dylan’s Christmas album. But most of all, “ridiculous” is contacting a total stranger and making witless, vitriolic generalizations about 14,000,000 people and labeling them all clods because you think they find you hot. <\/p>\n

Well, no matter how hunky you may be to the brain-dead community, I, for one, am NOT willing to have sex with you! I mean, sweet fancy Moses, you’ve never even bought me dinner. <\/em><\/p>\n

Awaiting another scintillating reply…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Youhaven't forgotten our pal Nick Smith, have you? He's the hater who emailed me out of the blue to inform me how dippy Mormons are<\/a>, something he knows personally because Mormon women are dumb enough to have sex with him. I would think he'd recognize how badly that reflects on him<\/em>, not me, ... Read more<\/a>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2387","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2387","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2387"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2387\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2387"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2387"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stallioncornell.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2387"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}