In my first month as a 19-year-old Mormon missionary in Scotland, I remember standing outside a grocery store, and a two or three year-old rugrat came up to me, kicked my leg as hard as he could, and said, loudly, “Get a f$&*ing job.”

It was then that I learned, if I didn’t know it before, that Mormons are universally less than beloved.

As the Mitt speech gets ingested into the national consciousness, I’m reminded of the fact that my faith makes me weirder and more of an outsider to the world at large than I want to admit. Almost everyone agrees the speech was terrific, but it doesn’t seem to be translating into support. The action line is “Mitt gave a great speech; he’s still a freak, though.” Swell.

Consequently, I’m becoming increasingly annoyed with Huckabee for reasons that are only partly rational. He’s been very Clintonian about the whole religion thing. He has to know that he’s riding a wave of anti-Mormon sentiment that he welcomes because of its usefulness. In my mind, he’s not very far removed from that stupid little Scottish kid, and I get the feeling that if Mike Huckabee had a chance to kick me in the leg, he probably would.

It turns my stomach that my so-called political allies are made up of people that are willing to spread distortions, slander, and outright lies to destroy my faith. Every time I go to a conservative website that allows comments – lucianne.com comes to mind – my fellow Republicans rail on my church with barely contained fury, and I wonder if Hillary and her ilk could be any worse. Harry Reid doesn’t seem to get this kind of treatment from his fellow Democrats. Are we really so intolerant as a party? It boggles the mind.

I could go into martyr mode, I guess – the Savior talked about how blessed we are if people persecute us and such. Looking through history, I can’t seem to find a time when the Lord’s people were treated with respect by the rest of the world. I should take solace in that. But it bugs me all the same.

I’m a Mitt guy, but I could support Thompson. Or, holding my nose, Rudy. McCain? No. He’s nuts. Huckabee? At this point, no. I just don’t see how I can back a guy who encourages slanders about my faith. How could he be any worse than Hillary?

Dumb question. Of course Hillary’s worse, and of course I’d vote for Huckabee if he were the nominee. But I sure as hell am not going to be happy about it.

Maybe I’m not a Christian, after all. When Huckabee rallies his anti-Mormon army, instead of turning the other cheek, I kind of want to kick back.