Phase Two and a Big Head

An actual conversation that just took place with a friend I hadn’t seen for a few weeks…

Him: “Hey, you look really thin!”

Me: “Thanks! I’ve lost about thirty pounds.”

Him: “But you still have a ginormous head. It looks really weird on a thin body.”

Yes, well, not much I can do about that. I’ve always been a prototype of the whole “orange on a toothpick” motif, even when my weight was only in double digits. My parents always said that if I finally grew into my head, I’d be enormous. I grew, but my head still doesn’t fit. Or maybe it’s my body that doesn’t really fit with the head. Either way, I’m happier to have a head that’s far less chubby, even if it is still sizeable.

Big heads, incidentally, run in the family. In one of her infant check-ups, we found out my oldest daughter’s head size was in the 99th percentile.

“Oh, that’s terrific!” the doctor said.


“Well, this is the first time she’s been in a normal range. She was way off the charts in her last visit.”

Thankfully, she has grown with better proportions than her old man. And she doesn’t need to slim down. Although she has been nicking some of my Somae Health protein smoothies that have been fueling my weight loss. I love those things! A cup of fruit – berries, etc. – along with a little bit of almond milk, some ice, and two scoops of the magic Somae powder, and presto! Low calorie, high nutrition goodness. Which is pretty much my life now.

Phase Two is far more demanding than Phase One was. I eat no grain or dairy at all, and I lost one serving of fruit. In addition, my protein servings are only 3.5 ounces, not 4, like they were in the last phase. This made for some hungry days before I discovered the smoothies. Those suckers fill you up without bloating your gut. Good, good stuff.

One of the things that worried me was that, for about a week, my weight was staying constant. Part of that was due to the fact that I was exercising a whole lot, and, hopefully, adding a bit of muscle. But that didn’t explain all of it. After all, I was dropping about two punds a day on Phase One. Why wasn’t Phase Two working for me?

My weight loss mentor suggested that my body was trying to “reset” itself, with that new weight as the new normal. She recommended that I do what they call an “apple day,” where I ate nothing but apples for twenty-four hours. Eight apples total. Believe me, that’s a lot of apples. After apple 4, I started to hate the sight of those things. But it worked – I had lost 2.5 pounds when I stepped on the scale the next morning, and my weight loss in the week since I ate nothing but those vile red things has been steady, if somewhat slower than I’d like. But I’m getting into a groove now – I know what I can and can’t eat, and I’m not struggling to avoid the steady stream of chips and salsa that made the man I am today – or at least the man I was a little over a month ago when I started following the Somae program.

By my count, I’ve lost just over twenty-five pounds, but I had a doctor’s appointment yesterday where I had to weigh in. The nurse practitioner was startled when she noted that I was thirty-one pounds lighter than the last time I had weighed in. My blood pressure was also far better than it had been, and she told me that whatever I was doing, I ought to keep it up.

So I will. But I’m not going to get a big head about it.

The Cleanse
It's Not 1984

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